Jeff Eckert made me a better person. He was kind, funny, and knew how to do all of things that I didn't. He loved to laugh, and when he did, so did everybody else. Jeff wanted to get the most out of his life, and for him, that meant having as much fun as he could. He made beautiful music, and entertained in a naturally modest way that stole my heart from the very beginning.
The joy that the both of us felt when JD was born was powerful, and I think, quite unexpected for Jeff. He had no idea what becoming a Dad would do to him. While the past two years were incredibly difficult, I can not describe them any way, but as the best two years of Jeff's and my life together. After many years of loving just each other, we were able to channel our love together into our little boy, who amazingly, seems to have inherited the best of both of us. While it is a rotten, rotten shame that JD will not get to grow up knowing his father personally, I am sure that I, and others who were close to Jeff, carry his energy with us. And, I've no doubt that JD will feel that energy not only from within himself, but from the people who surround and love him.
I'd forgotten what it feels like to grieve for someone that you love so much. We lost Mom very suddenly, and I'm now remembering how intense the feelings are, how your body aches all over, and how your heart feels like it might explode from your chest. It's paralyzing, and the truth and finality of it all has you staring at your remaining family in disbelief. Can this really have happened? Leukemia? Relapses? Stem cell transplants (plural)?? WTF??? Over and over again in my mind.
The healing road is a long one, with many hills to climb. I know that we'll all have bad days, but somewhere along the way, we'll start to have good times again, and eventually, the good days will outweigh the bad. Laughter will come, love will come even more easily than before, and we'll all hold on to each other a little tighter as we remember the real lesson -- life is about the moments we share with each other, and those moments can only happen right now.
15 comments:
Jamie, you are a strong, strong person. You will get through this with the love and memories you shared with Jeff. Your words have always amazed me. Our deepest sympathies are with you and your family.
Jamie,
This is pure evidence that you are a strong and loving person. JD is lucky to have you as a mother.
Jamie,
You are an amazing person. Jeff was so lucky to have found you and JD even luckier to have you as his mom. The strength and courage you have shown is remarkable. You truly inspire many. It is such a shame that your lives took you on such a journey, but I'm sure along with the hardships, there was much joy that will stay with you.
My prayers will continue to help you on the path of healing. Hold tight to your memories.
Thinking of you all,
Jen Spong
...I am truly inspired with your last sentence " life is about the moments we share with each other, and those moments can only happen right now. " ... God Bless you, JD, and your entire family.
Jeff and you fought this illness with inspiring courage and dignity. God bless you all.
Faisal and Jackie
Jamie,
I really enjoy reading your blog. You have a way with words and are able to make us all feel like your friend. I know the days ahead will be rough going, but always remember that God doesn't close one door without opening another. Just remember that there are many, many people praying for you and DJ. Just hold him close and love him and in time it will get a little easier. You and Jeff really had your own Love Story.
Jamie,
You are such a strong woman...I wish you did not have to lose so much in life at an early age. It was a shame to lose a mother and then a husband. I keep thinking what if I were in your shoes, and I don't know if I could handle it as you have with dignity and inspiration.
I watched you at the funeral home tonight and thought to myself how well you held up. I am sure it has to do with all of the love surrounding you, but still I was proud to see you so strong. It makes me hope that one day I could be like that. I hope and pray that your path to healing will be easier on you with all of the people that love you and Jeff. Again, I still do not think that I have great inspiring words to tell you, but know that we love you and are deeply sorry.
Love,
Becca Krug
Jamie,
I am truly amazed and inspired by your inspiration and strength. The hand that you were dealt in life is not only unfair but almost can seem unbearable. However, you manage it with dignity and pride. Your son JD is blessed and lucky to have a mother as strong as you. Jeff would not have only been proud but honored with how you handled things, and how you will raise JD. Fullfilling your life with JD will allow you to continue your life with Jeff in it. You and your family are and will continue to be in my thoughts and prayers. God Bless and may he look over you in the long days that lie ahead.
Love,
Dana Reagle McCue and Family
Raise your hand
if Jeff made you a better person.
Kenny, Marilyn and Mark know 1st hand that both hands of JD would be flying high immediately.
All who were lucky enough to have known him have theirs raised as well.
I am one of the lucky ones that can say that Jeff was my family and good friend. We grew up together and spent alot of our time together. When Jeff decided to transfer to SMA, Marilyn asked me to help Jeff make good friends and keep him out of trouble. Well, that wasn't a very hard job. With his great personality and a one of kind laugh he made alot of good friends. Then he met Jamie and my job was done. Although we may have all had our differences at one point or another, like most kids do, I can say that I am very happy that Jamie and Jeff met. Jamie, thank you for always being there for Jeff and giving him the strength when he needed it.
When JD was born I called Jeff and asked for some advice as I was preparing to have my first son as well. He told me that it was amazing and that there are really no words to describe the feeling that comes over you.....and he was right. JD is going to be so proud to hear all of the great stories about his daddy being a great father, a great husband, a great son, a great brother, a great friend, an all around great person....
Jamie just remember during the tough times that " life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away".
-Angela
Jamie,
For two years I have wanted to post something inspirational for you and Jeff, but it has been your words of love, courage, hope and strength that I looked forward to read. I don't understand why bad things happen to good people or why? But I do know that you will definitely keep shining as a mom. And the both of you will be okay..your family and friends will make sure of that.
With my deepest sympathy
-Nicki Shannon
Dear Jamie,
I have never in my life witnessed so much love, and heartache, in one room as I did during Jeff's funeral. He touched so many, many lives and so did you and little J.D. He will be your strength now, as he is your joy, your pride, your heart, your smiles, your "everything".
J.D.is such a beautiful little boy and I loved that he won the St. Marys Baby Contest! He has his Daddy's beautiful blue eyes and wonderful smile! Keep taking and posting those pictures of him too, okay?
Please let all of us continue on with you on your future journey now with little J.D. with your writings, when you can. You inspire all of us, Jamie, and have such wisdom and insight for someone so young and lots of happy memories of your life with Jeff. You two packed more fun into your years together than most people have in 60 years of marriage!
I read a quote to Marilyn today and she wanted me to send it to her so am including it here for you, as well.
"God gave us memories so that we might have roses in December."
Treasure yours always, Sweetheart.
With all my love ~ Betsy
Jamie,
I'm so sorry to hear about Jeff. I deeply understand and share your feelings right now. My beloved brother is also undergoing mini-transplant after his second relapse. We are all so worried but will remain hopeful, taking a day at a time. Stay strong !!! I will keep you and JD in my prayers.
Jamie,
I continue to think of you and your family each and everyday. I saw JD's picture in the paper and couldn't help but smile. He is so darn cute. I just wanted to let you know how much you and Jeff have made a difference in the way I look at life. I would hope someday in the future that you consider writing a book to inspire others as well. You were given the gift of writing and the love of Jeff. With that combination you have the power to touch so many people. My thoughts and prayers are with you.
I remember jeff at your wedding. I was in the restroom wondering why the was so little toilet paper when Jeff had walked in. Someone with him mentioned he had found quite a catch and continued on about you. Jeff said, thank you she is the love of my life.
I thought I would share this with you even though we are virtual strangers. I hope you the best Jamie.
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