For me, waiting is the hardest part. Danielle and Paula will verify that I get annoyed with them because they take too long to get out of the car. I'm usually driving, so I have to get parked and get my stuff ready and then get out of the car. I still manage to beat them out the door by several steps. I then have to stand there WAITING for them, while they diddle-daddle. I don't think I'm a particularly fast get-out-of-the-car person, they are just slow. And, I'm impatient.
So, you can imagine that waiting for biopsy results is not very easy for me. I like to know what's next, or be planning what's next so that we can get on with our lives. We don't know what the next step will be until we know what Jeff's marrow looks like. Best case is that Jeff's marrow is empty and he actually recovers in remission and stays in remission until transplant time. Worst case is that Jeff's leukemia is becoming chemo-resistant and Jeff decides that enough is enough. The treatment of this disease causes enough pain and misery that at some point you have to look at your chances and decide whether or not it is worth spending, what may be the last few months of your life, in a chemo and gvh induced hell, or spend it relatively comfortably. Thirty year old men should not have to consider things like this, and neither should their wives.
Anyway, while we are waiting, I'm trying to be present to the moment, because really, that's all that any of us really has. Yesterday, while I was practicing being "present to the moment," and doing some of my work at Panera Bread, somebody managed to hit my parked car. Luckily, the damage was minimal AND they were nice enough to leave me a note with their name and number. I'm not sure if I'll bother getting it fixed. I like a car with character, and really, isn't that what bumpers are for?
The last little bit of excitement that occurred yesterday happened when JD got stung by a bee. JD is a curious little bugger and I guess that he wasn't willing to take my word that bee stings hurt. When my little man started screaming so suddenly, I knew exactly what happened, and confirmed it when I pulled the stinger out of his little thumb. He carried on for a bit, and showed my his puffy thumb about 10 more times before he went to bed.
9 comments:
Did your kisses make JD's thumb feel a little better? I had to kiss Brian's shoulder yesterday -- silly daddy. I wish you could kiss Jeff's pain away...
Yes, Rachael....kisses still help JD to feel better.
I GET OUT OF THE CAR FAST!
(now that I know about getting out of the car slow vs fast).
Danielle does dilly dally (fixes hair, checks for shoes, bends over for what?...Jamie and I haven't been able to figure out that one)!
Finally she emerges only to turn around to get just 'one more thing'.
Sorry, Danielle, you lose at getting out of the car.
On the flip side: Jamie, you are correct! You (we) are an impatient bunch.
Side comment: You have an awesome car with a little bit of history. You are handling this just like your mom.
Baby comment: JD loves bugs!
It's only natural for him to touch a bee.
Good for you, JD, show your boo-boo ten more times!
What a boy!
Finally: Jeff, we all have rally towels no matter what you decide.
Hang in there all of you. Jeff will make the right decision when the time comes. No, a thirty year old man shouldn't have to even think about stuff like this. You guys are an inspiration to the rest of us.
The Bee thing is just one of many that JD will have to test out by himself.
Keep strong. Love you, Nancy
I truly don't understand why such terrible stuff has to happen to such good people. None of this seems fair for anyone to be going through. If your blog does nothing else, I hope it forces the rest of us to try and pause for a few seconds in our busy lives and cherish what and who we have around us...including the barking dog, the crying baby, our demanding jobs, and our curious toddlers!! I pray everyday that this nightmare will end soon for all of you on a happy note. I hope that you all get some good news soon. - Debbie
Hi Jamie, Jeff and JD. We are Ron and Lynn Schatz. I went to school with Mark and Ron works with your father in law and uncle... Just wanted to let you know that we are praying for your family and Jeff will make the right decision when the time comes. Our thoughts are with you and give that little boy a big hug!!!
Lynn
Keeping you all in our prayers!!
Robin and Audra
Gee what an awful day...now is the time to say "W.T.F."!!
Things I wish, hope and pray for:
1. JD, that your finger is better today;
2. Jamie, for you I wish you all the patience and strength in the world;
3. Jeff, for you I wish this would just all go away!!! I pray for your strength in dealing with all this and I pray for your health and happiness.
I didn't know JD LOVED bugs -- I have so much to teach him. You know, if it was a honey bee (Apis mellifer, L.), then I could totally teach him the bee dance. It's real, and interpretable -- honest. :)
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